Surviving Quicksand: How to Get out of a Tedious Cycle
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Surviving Quicksand: How to Get out of a Tedious Cycle
As a kid, I used to be fascinated by the idea of quicksand. Cartoons and movies made it seem like it would be something — alongside giant man-eating plants — I would at least encounter once in my lifetime. It turns out real-world quicksand is not actually that big of a problem. But what about metaphorical quicksand? The state of mind where no matter what you try to do, things seem to be getting worse and worse — why didn't the Looney Tunes prepare me for that?
"You're playing and you think everything is going fine. Then one thing goes wrong. And then another. And another. You try to fight back, but the harder you fight, the deeper you sink. Until you can't move... you can't breathe... because you're in over your head. Like quicksand." - Shane Falco (The Replacements, 2000)
I obviously do not know what the entirety of the human condition is like, but I am certain that at some point or another everyone has felt like they were stuck in metaphorical quicksand; like no matter how hard you tried to make things better, they just got worse and worse.
According to experts, surviving real-world quicksand is not that difficult. In fact, it is nearly impossible to drown in quicksand. The object's density is so high that sinking all the way in would be a nearly impossible act. Instead, when quicksand is involved in (rare) deaths, it is either because people were stuck in the sun and died of dehydration or because they were stuck in an area where a high tide rolled in a later point and they drowned after hours of being stuck.
Although every person has their version of quicksand, and some situations like addiction require professional help, I think learning how to survive real quicksand might be the key to surviving the metaphorical kind. For me, quicksand manifests itself in the form of a tedious cycle. At many points in my life, I have felt as if I was stuck unable to move regardless of how much I struggled to get out. The current pandemic heightens that feeling. I am literally stuck in a country, unable to leave and unable to see the people I love. No matter how hard I work, for the time being, I'll be stuck.
Of course, beyond being physically stuck in one location, the main danger of quicksand is mental exhaustion. Whether you are out in the wilderness or sequestered in an office, it is important to remember that trying desperately to pull yourself out of quicksand is pointless — that's the nature of this monster.
For most people who are stuck in real quicksand, their only salvation is another person helping them out. But it is important to realize that ultimately only the person who is inside the quicksand can pull themselves out. Any attempts to use brute strength to pull a person out may actually end up hurting that person. Instead, if you are trying to help someone stuck in quicksand, help them remain calm. Experts suggest that a person stuck in quicksand lean back to increase their surface tension allowing them to float up.
If you are stuck in a tedious cycle do not be afraid to ask for help, but remember that ultimately things can only change if you take action into your own hands. The people around you have no way of seeing how deep your body is under the quicksand, only you can self-access your situation and help direct yourself towards help. And although it may seem counterfactual, sometimes leaning back and remaining calm is more effective than punching your way out.
When you are stuck in a tedious cycle, you maybe be tempted to doing something large and grand, but if you are already feeling exhausted the process of planning a large escape may only leave you more tired. Instead, try to slow down. Quick movements might push you in deeper but slow carefully thought actions might help you see the next steps you need to get out.
Every person will have a different path out of their own tedious cycle, but in almost all situations a calm head will prevail.
"When adversity strikes, that's when you have to be the most calm. Take a step back, stay strong, stay grounded and press on." -L Cool J